That sinking feeling

KANAK HIRANI NAUTIYAL / TNN / Jun 25, 2006, 18:58 IST

Text Size

Small
Medium
Large

As football teams now begin to taste defeat by tiny and huge margins, we explore the impact of loss.

As football teams now begin to taste defeat by tiny and huge margins, we explore the impact of loss.
Paval Nedved isn't the only one learning how to deal with defeat. Besides this Czech Republic midfielder, many teams will now sadly pack their bags and head home after losing crucial World Cup matches.
As one winner emerges at the biggest sporting event of all time, others will have to come to terms with the hardest truth: loss.And like they say, losing is never easy.
Different people deal differently with defeat, says swimmer Nisha Millet. When you're young, you cry and make a fuss.

But as you get older, you learn to deal with the loss if you're a true sportsperson. From personal experience, Nisha believes the best way to deal with it is by bouncing back.
"Get back on your feet again and give it another shot."But Nisha feels it's different for these World Cup teams, "because it's a once-in-four-year event. It's like the Olympics and I know how it feels not to qualify."
She recalls the time when she missed making it past the 2000 Olympic qualifying meet. The only people, she feels, will never take defeat badly are the underdogs. "Like Ghana whatever they do is good because no one really expects them to win."

Whether it's a sporting event or a beauty contest, losing out on a chance to represent your country will always hurt. Model Radhika Rao, who didn't make it to the Femina Miss India finals, says that it's either winning or losing.
"There's no in-between and you have to realise that."When she realised that she didn't make it, Radhika took it in her stride. "But there were those who said it's not fair, or others who found someone to blame.
"I thought maybe I didn't win because there was something lacking in me. The best solution is to improve yourself and win in the future,"says Radhika.
So low
Psychiatrist Dr B Kapur says individual reaction to loss depends on the personality type. "The most common reaction is denial; people say, 'it can't happen to me' and they blame others."Then there's anger or frustration, where the person is on a short fuse.
"The person could also go into depression, followed by acceptance. At the last stage, the person realises his shortcomings and gets motivated to work harder next time."Dr Kapur says a lot also depends on the amount of frenzy built up before the event.
How to cope could involve mental preparedness, where the person realises they can't always get what they want. "But what's worse is when the entire nation goes through that depression; and in such reactions to grief, rioting is common,"he adds.
Recovery from defeat takes anywhere between four to six weeks. "That's considered normal. We step in after that if a person hasn't recovered by then."
kanakhirani@indiatimes.com

End of Article